Suddenly a caregiver? Here’s some help with where to start

Sometimes, becoming a caregiver can be sudden and startling—like having a deer jump into the road in front of you. And when you feel like you don't know where to start, taking on this life-changing responsibility can feel overwhelming and insurmountable.

We can help. Here’s a list of some key things you can do to get your bearings and start providing the care and attention your loved one deserves.

Assess the situation

Learn as much as you can about your loved one’s current medical state and circumstances. This will determine the caregiving that’s needed now, and it will help you prepare for the future. 

Answers to these questions will get you started. If needed, plan for an additional conversation with your loved one’s primary care physician (PCP) and/or care team. 

• What is the medical situation right now?
• How can/will the situation evolve?
• How many medical specialists are involved now in providing care? 
• What type of care is being provided now and how long is it needed? 
• Are there any changes to current medications or have new ones been prescribed?
• Is care information being shared with your loved one’s PCP? 
• If your loved one is hospitalized, what is the discharge plan? It’s never too early to ask about this because you will need to prepare.

In most situations, health care providers will be able to share key information with you. But in some cases, your loved one will need to have a signed HIPAA form—the document that gives a third party (you) access to the medical information of the person receiving care. At some point, you may need to learn about other signed documents that pertain to what their wishes are for treatment, etc., such as a health care proxy.

You may also want to contact your loved one’s health insurance plan to learn about any services/benefits that may be of use. If your loved one has Medicare, you’ll need to use the Appointment of Representative form.

Do a safety assessment

If your loved one has been living at home and will return there—or will be staying in someone else’s home—it’s important to make sure it’s a safe environment. Here are some key items to focus on:

• Identify and fix any tripping hazards. 
• Inside the home, look for and secure any loose area rugs or exposed power cords, and clear hallways and stairs of clutter. 
• Outside the home, fix any broken steps, handrails, or uneven pavement/bricks. 
• Ensure indoor lighting is adequate and easily accessible.
• Make lamp switches easily reachable, and/or have flashlights handy.
• Install always-on night lights in hallways, bedrooms, and bathrooms.
• Determine if any assistive devices would be helpful, such as: 
• A hospital or adjustable bed, or any adaptive bed assistance products such as adjustable bed rails or medical step stools with handrails
• Grab bars, waterproof seats, and/or rubber mats for the bathroom
• A wearable medical alert device

Look after yourself 

You’re taking on an important role, and it’s easy to overextend yourself. But you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself means you’ll be at your best when taking care of your loved one.

• Community and family are key. Find a caregiver support group, either locally or online, and enlist some help from family members.
• Eat well and exercise. Both will support your overall well-being, which will help you succeed in your new role as caregiver.
• If your company has an employee assistance program (EAP), use it. It can provide information, support, and resources to help you with caregiving.
• Take time off if you need to. The Massachusetts Paid Family Medical Leave (MA-PFML) law provides job protection and temporary wage replacement for most people who work in Massachusetts when they need to manage family or medical situations.

Posted: Nov. 21, 2022